Yet more woo intruding upon my life

I was already working on one blog post about medical woo, then this arrived in the mail yesterday.  I am no photographer, but hopefully you can read what it says on the package.  According to said packaging, this is an EFX Certified (ooh, certified)  Authentic Embedded Wearable Holographic Technology Performance Wristband.  Well ain’t that special.  I’ll do a breakdown of all the interesting tidbits on this package.

It’s designed to stabilize and harmonize the body’s bioelectric current.  Do you ever get the feeling that someone is using words without knowing what they mean?  So, are they assuming that my body’s “bioelectric current” is unstable?  When they use the word harmonize, are the talking about singing?  Perhaps they are referring to the phenomenon in physics concerning even multiples of wave frequencies?  I can’t find any definitions that make sense to me in this context.  And WTF is my body’s “bioelectic current” anyway?  WebMD talks about bioelectric therapy, but nothing about bioelectric current.  Wikipedia has this on bioelectromagnetism, but its references are pretty light.  Ah, has something:

(physiology) A self-propagating electric current generated on the surface of nerve and muscle cells by potential differences across excitable cell membranes.

No mention of why I might need to stabilize or harmonize it though.  Anyway, it says the benefits may reduce stress, jet lag, swelling and motion sickness, and may increase balance, strength, flexibility and endurance.  Wow, sounds great.  Dare I say too great? 

The thing is basically a silicone (like lots of cooking utensils use) wristband with a cheesy little hologram picture in it.  You know, like credit cards have been using for decades, several companies use on their currency, and passports have.  It’s useful because they are pretty hard to forge.  Which however has absolutely nothing to do with your “Bioelectric Current”. 

Turns out it’s another scam.  These bracelets do nothing to improve your balance or otherwise.  Wikipedia has a pretty good breakdown of an experiment done with the similar Power Balance wristband.  At least there is some justice in the world.  A lawsuit in Australia against Power Balance forced them to retract all their claims

I should add in closing that this thing arrived in the mail, addressed to a previous occupant of our house.  It kinda looks cool, and I like silicone, but there’s nothing magical about it.  Just a piece of rubber.  Oh, and please don’t go shell out up to $60 for one, with the expectation that it will help you in some way.  Get a wristband that donates the money to some charity, instead of scammers looking to make an easy buck off a few cents worth of silicone.



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3 responses to “Yet more woo intruding upon my life

  1. Matt G

    Haha. I’m going to sound like an idiot here, but I have actually bought something similar to this – no where near $60 though.

    They sound like the same product; they are titanium-infused silicone necklaces and bracelets that are meant to increase balance, make you sweat less, etc., but fortunately I bought it for the looks. I notice NO difference when playing tennis/basketball like all the pro-athletes “claim” they do.

  2. Nice little video demonstrating how those folks selling these in the malls do it:

  3. Matt G

    lol, “amazing results!” That doctor sounds similar to the one you may have went to with Chey. Perhaps you should ask if he’s heard of Phiten necklaces.

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